Call of Duty "Modern Warfare" was originally titled "The Chuck Norris Story"
..Chuck Norris was bitten by a snake. Three days later the snake died.
..The best part of waking up is not Folgers in your cup, but knowing that Chuck Norris didn't kill you in your sleep.
..MacGyver can build a bomb out of paper clips, rubber bands, and soda cans. Chuck Norris can build a bomb out of MacGyver.
..Chuck Norris once got a hole in 1 at Augusta National. After he Tee'd off on the first hole at Pebble Beach
..Chuck Norris can dig a hole in air.
..Chuck Norris once ran a marathon backwards...just to see what second place looks like
..Chuck Norris can cut through a hot knife with butter
..Before they met Chuck Norris, the Black Eyed Peas were simply known as "The Peas."
..Just say "Chuck Norris" and you'll win the arguement.
..Chuck Norris can tie his shoes with his feet.
..NObody can "delete" Chuck Norris, Chuck Norris deletes you!
..Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
..Chuck Norris is so persuasive that he convinced a mirror he wasn't there.
..Chuck Norris can strangle you with a cordless telephone
..Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
..Chuck Norris and Superman once fought each other on a bet. The loser had to start wearing his underwear on the outside of his pants.
..Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
..Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
..Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle
..Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.
..Chuck Norris can win an argument with his wife.
..Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer
..Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect Four in only three moves.
..Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because Chuck Norris only recognizes the element of surprise.
..Chuck Norris once kicked a horse in the chin. Its decendants are known today as Giraffes.
..They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but there was a problem: It wouldn't take shit from anybody.
..It is an obvious fact that Chuck Norris has been to Mars, seeing as there is absolutely NO life on Mars.
..Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.
..Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch. HE decides what time it is.
..Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack. His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.
..Chuck Norris does not fart, nothing escapes Chuck Norris
..Chuck Norris played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won.
..Chuck Norris can divide by zero
..When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
..Chuck Norris's 1st Grade teacher asked him how many stars there were on the American Flag. Chuck Norris replied "Yes." and was correct.
..There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.
..Chuck Norris CAN touch MC Hammer
..Chuck Norris doesn't have a shadow. His shadow isn't stupid enough to follow him around.
..Chuck Norris knows the last digit of pi.
..The only poster Chuck Norris has on his bedroom wall is a mirror.
..Chuck Norris once ate an entire bottle of sleeping pills. They made him blink.
..Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.
..The original title for Alien vs. Predator was Alien and Predator vs Chuck Norris... The film was cancelled shortly after going into preproduction. No one would pay nine dollars to see a movie fourteen seconds long.
.Google won't search for Chuck Norris because it knows you don't find Chuck Norris, he finds you.
..If you spell Chuck Norris in Scrabble, you win. Forever.
..Chuck Norris owns a guard dog not to protect himself but to protect everyone else
..Chuck Norris got into a knife fight. The knife lost.
..Chuck Norris is the only man to punch a cyclops between the eyes
..Chuck Norris was the first person in the world to reach 10th prestige on call of duty